Inanimate Objects
I have a love-hate relationship with inanimate objects. I appreciate them for their utility, but I genuinely have no patience for their insubordination. Take, for…
Velominati Super Prestige
Browse the VSP archives →
Browse the VSP archives →
Look Pro: Rollin’ Dirty
When it comes to training, no one loves riding outside and loathes riding inside more than I do. On the other hand, riding outside is…
Shifting Sands
One of my favorite stories in Cycling is of the 1989 World Championships. It was a very lumpy parcours, with a particularly tough climb near…
The Justifier
I kind of like the fact that I still have to look up what number certain Rules are. Some stick in my mind, usually due…
The Aesthete’s Choice: Boyaux Naturel
Tradition and innovation are the two opposing edges that cut our evolution through the fabric of our sport. Tradition grounds us, while innovation ensures we advance…
On Rule #74: The Targeting Computer
I could feel the power in my body as I breathed in the warm Spring air and pulled lightly on the handlebars; strength flowed from my lungs and…
And the 39 Was Clean as a Whistle
I still feel that variable gears are only for people over forty-five. Isn’t it better to triumph by the strength of your muscles than by…
Test Drive Dummies
Everyone knows it’s a great idea to change out pieces of equipment the day before a group ride, especially an honorary Ronde van Vlaanderen Cogal…
Goldilocks Principle: The Golden Ratio
There is a disturbance in the V. I have felt it for some time, and I suspect many of you have as well. The matter…
Fendangelism
Mudguards (fenders) and saddlebags are two subjects that are sure to get our collective ire up as Cyclists. When I wrote in one of my columns for…
To Bidon Or Not To Bidon
This is serious, people. I hope you’re sitting down. Really. Sit down. Not a half sit. A real sit. Both cheeks. If you’re reading this…
On Rules #26 and #65: Spring Theory
To hold opposing truths in one’s heart is a beautiful thing; to find resonance within contradiction is a liberating force that opens one’s mind to a…
On the Rivet
I’m proud to declare that I am fluent in three languages: Hyperbole, Dutch, and English. All of them rubbish. The language of the peloton is,…
Dress Like An Onion: The Art of Layering
The thing about the cold is that you can never tell how cold it is from looking out a kitchen window. You have to dress…
The Pain of Adolescence
There are three subjects you should not bring up in new company: Politics, Saddle Bags, and Helmets. In my experience, in fact, politics are a…
The Nine Kit
Riding in bad weather is an incredible experience assuming you don’t fall off and break your hip, or you don’t get hit by a car. Those…
Inflation
My first bike was a Sears Moonlight Special. It was literally a piece of shit – figuratively. I mean, it would only “literally” be a…
Cover High Before You Cover Low
With the transitions of seasons occurring all over the world as Summer shifts to Fall in the Northern Hemisphere and Winter to Spring in the…
In Memoriam: The Funny Bike
Summer, it appears, has been snatched abruptly from Seattle’s grasp, like a squeak toy from a puppy’s mouth. A week ago, we were setting record temperatures which were…
In Memoriam: The Straight Block
Disc brakes and 1x drivetrains. These are the sort of things that belong on mountainbikes, are questionable on cross bikes, and should make an immediate trip…